Changing stations, different phases

It wasn't too long ago that I play acted at being a grown-up in relationships, in work and life in general. Somehow, that play-acting has become all too real recently. When faced with the prospect of serious, life changing decisions, I suddenly feel an overwhelming fear mixed with hope for the future.

For once, since 19 years-old in my first love relationship, my world feels like it CAN turn out to be ok. The milestones in my life, since leaving that relationship, like achieving my dream of being a scribe at 21, seems a long time ago. After the sting of failed dreams, it seems alright today. After years of being in limbo, someone's telling me, it's alright. Sunshowers came recently.

Today, I have the shot at being someone in my chosen profession, privately, there's another special significant one in my life. He was always worried that I could never make it on my own. For years, he was my guardian from all things painful. In the end, he let me go because he saw I would never have my full potential realised if he was always to be my shelter. All things happen for a reason, and with the wisdom of hindsight, I'm grateful for that.

Fast forward 7 years onwards, all the universe seems to have converged to make my dearest dreams come true. It's so overwhelming that it's almost more than I can bear. I mean, how else can you feel when for the longest time, your life motto has been "shit happens" right?

But when everything's made to be broken, I hope that the ones who matter will know who I really am and stick through the bad and be happy for the good.